Even the smartest, most on-top-of-things couple can make mistakes during wedding planning. Here are the 10 things you should keep an eye on before saying “I do.”
It costs a lot of money to throw a wedding. Many times, excited brides start booking vendors and making purchases without having a real budget and then are shocked to discover they’ve already spent all of their (or their parents’) money and don’t yet have half the things they need. If you bounce checks or don’t have the money to pay your deposits, or make your final payments on the wedding day, your wedding will not happen. Trust us—the band is not going to play all night if you don’t pay. Planning a wedding is serious business. Make a budget and keep track of your expenditures so you won’t be walking naked down the aisle. Need help? Use our wedding budgeter for an interactive tool that does it all for you.
There are so many rules surrounding marriage licenses. For instance, if you get your license 61 days before your wedding in Pennsylvania, you won’t be able to legally marry on your wedding day because a license is valid there for only 60 days. Go to obtain your license the day before your wedding, and you may not get it in time because some states have a three-day waiting period. A common mess-up for those marrying for a second time is not bringing official divorce papers when you go to get the certificate.
If your heart is set on a couture wedding dress, be sure to order by the six-month mark, since your dress will be custom made and, many times, made overseas. In addition, most off-the-rack wedding dresses will require alterations, so make certain that you have enough time to get the gown fitted properly. You’ll want to leave plenty of time for shipping and for your fittings. The same goes for the bridesmaid dresses.
Brides often leave blocking out hotel rooms for out-of-town wedding guests until the last minute. If you’re marrying during a busy time and you don’t investigate hotel availability in advance, you can end up with literally not a single room for your guests to stay. Your wedding will go on—but no one will be able to attend. Reserve rooms as early as possible. Begin your research up to a year in advance, and make sure your block is booked at least by the eight-month mark—if not sooner! Include hotel information in your save-the-date cards or invitations. This doesn’t mean you’ll have to pay for the rooms; you’re just setting them aside. Your guests will put down their own credit cards when they call to book the rooms.
Make sure your guest list and your reception site capacity match up numbers-wise. You can’t invite 400 people assuming only 250 will accept, because if you end up with 300 acceptances, you may have to turn 50 guests away at the door. Most wedding venues can’t just add 10 more tables—fire laws limit the maximum number of people allowed in any room at one time. Analyze your guest list from the get-go, assume 80 percent will respond “yes,” and limit your guest list accordingly.
Many brides think that scheduling a facial the day before the wedding will leave their skin looking angelic on their big days. Thinking of tanning the day before your wedding? Think again: You may end up with blisters instead of sun-kissed skin. Last-minute beauty treatments can lead to breakouts, mistakes or, even worse, serious infections. Same goes for crash dieting in the weeks leading up to the wedding—after all those gown fittings, your dress may not fit! Stick to a long-term beauty regimen with lots of rest, a good diet and safe, over-the-counter beauty products like sunless tanners. Save the heavy-duty beauty treatments for at least two weeks before the big day, or you could risk ruining all the hard work you’ve done to make your wedding—and your photos—perfect (never mind putting your health and happiness at risk for the most important day of your life).
You’d be surprised how many brides just stick a regular stamp on their invites and drop the whole batch into a mailbox. All but a few wedding invitationsrequire additional postage—sometimes up to 55 cents. The postal service will not take pity on you! Your invites will be returned, rubber-stamped with that ugly “insufficient postage” sign, and it will take at least three weeks (plus additional money) to get those invitations back out the door. Get one invitation weighed at the post office before purchasing your stamps. Note: Square invitations require additional postage not only because of the weight but the shape, so don’t try to figure this out by yourself.
Inappropriate attire for the church or temple, or skipping the Pre-Cana, may keep your officiant from marrying you when the day finally arrives. Take your religious restrictions seriously. To avoid any day-of disasters, be sure to meet with your officiant within one month of getting engaged. Your house of worship may perform ceremonies only on specific days, so settle on a date with your clergyman before you start to book vendors and put down deposits. Ask him or her about religious rules, such as: Do you need to complete a pre-cana course? Can you write your own wedding vows? Do you need to cover your shoulders? Is secular music permitted?
If you’re a bride lucky enough to have been offered help by friends or family members, by all means take it! Too many brides try to do it all—and this isn’t a good idea. Delegate and use all the resources that are available to you. When people offer to assist, like your mom, future mother-in-law or best friend, find something for them to do, like researching a vendor or addressing invitations. On that note, it’s important to keep in mind that these volunteers are not hired help; be sure you accept their contributions graciously.
Keep in mind that you’re getting married and starting a life together, not justplanning a wedding. Be good to each other! Some tension between the two of you (and among members of your family) is inevitable due to the sticky topics that weddings stir up, but don’t ever let things get out of control. Remember why you decided to take this leap in the first place!
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